Wisdom Over Wires: The Counter-Cultural Christian 'NO' to Social Media Your Kids Will Thank You For.

By Familyguide

Every parent understands the challenge of declining a 13-year-old's request for social media access.

They might express feelings of exclusion, lament their inability to coordinate with friends, or even accuse you of being unfair. In these moments, you might find yourself second-guessing your decision, despite knowing you're acting in their best interest.

Titania Jordan, the Chief Parent Officer for Bark, a digital safety and monitoring platform, offered valuable advice to help parents articulate why they're delaying their child's entry into the world of social media.

1. "Start with the Objectively Good Reasons"
   • These compelling reasons span from critical health concerns to serious issues like screen addiction, exposure to inappropriate content, the inherent comparison trap on social media, online predators, grooming behaviors, and even the potential for suicidal thoughts arising from cyberbullying.
2. "Acknowledge that You Know This Will Be Hard"
   • Express empathy for your child, letting them know you understand their desire to join social media. Adolescents' social circles often revolve around these platforms, a point they'll likely emphasize when pushing for access. However, this isn't a sufficient reason to yield. Parents, stand firm; in the long run, your resolve will benefit your children more than they currently comprehend.
3. Have Some "Conversation Starters"
   • Prepare a series of questions to pose to your child when they inquire about your "no" to social media. This approach will help them grasp your rationale and facilitate a more constructive discussion.
   • Consider questions such as:
     • "What do you think are the most dangerous parts of social media?”
     • “What will this specific social media platform allow you to do that you can’t do now?”
     • “What would you do if someone started making you feel weird online?”
     • “What are some things you’ve heard about people getting into trouble with social media at school?”
     • “Do you really want social media or are you feeling pressured because everyone else has it?”
     • “If you could have just one social media account, what would it be and why?”
4. If It Gets Too Hard, Consider Compromises
   • While this might seem contradictory, it could involve allowing access to certain apps for a limited duration. Opt for applications that offer robust parental monitoring features. Additionally, insist that your child shares their login credentials with you. This fosters trust, and your child will be aware that you have visibility into their interactions and activities on the platform.

While raising children in the digital age presents unique challenges unknown to previous generations, it is indeed possible to guide children through their formative years without an online presence.

Just look at HGTV stars Erin and Ben Napier, who are so dedicated to keeping their kids offline that they co-founded a nonprofit called OSPREY — Old School Parents Raising Engaged Youth.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cr1eLYgp9Me/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

"We are parents committed to helping our kids achieve social media-free childhoods until they graduate high school," their mission statement declares. "When adolescents have no access to social media, they gain access to deeper engagement with their families, interests, and self-assurance. When we change the culture around 'everyone has it except my child' by linking arms with other parents in our communities and committing to embargo social media together beginning in the elementary grades, we set our children up for success before peer pressure can take it from them."

Guiding your child without social media may present immediate difficulties, but in the long run, they will undoubtedly appreciate your efforts in keeping them safe and equipping them with the essential real-life social competencies needed to thrive.